Today's Column:

406 McCain's Head

All Columns:

406 McCain's Head
405 Fred For Prez
404 The Election
403 Shwei Gwo Syau Jye
402 Pit Bulls and Pentagon
401 Walden Updated
400 Katrina South
399 AIPAC and Israel
398 Guns for Defense
397 Marrying Up
396 Sex and Head Space
395 Jim Webb for VP
394 Passing the Torch
393 Toilet Seats
392 More Darwin
391 Testifying Generals
390 Immigration Fun
389 The Fools of Aprils
388 Scoping Out Pepe
387 Outsourcing
386 Democracy, If Any
385 Immigration
384 Illusion of Competence
383 Eeek!
382 Death in Mexico
381 My Days with Rommel
380 Walphie at War
379 Fidel and Me
378 Race and Crime
377 A New Dark Age
376 Mayonnaise
375 Immigration
374 Party in Joco
373 A Racial Lynching
372 Taking a Break
371 Brains
370 Another South
369 A Dog to its Vomit
368 Socialized Medicine
367 Crimes of Jews
366 Desegregation
365 Comics as Education
364 Darwin and Banana Boobs
363 Galapagos
362 Rape in Tennessee
361 The Country Today
360 Deer Hunting with Jesus
359 Economics
358 Airbitchery
357 Hant Agin' Terror
356 Not Finding Brains
355 Intelligence
354 Politics as Perversion
353 Honor, If Any
352 Fleecing Uncle Patsy
351 The Moslem Wars
350 A Conversation with Bush
349 Tiresome Paranoia
348 A Misplaced Pagan
348 The National Character
347 Security as Theater
346 Victory Infallible
345 Hangmen of the Arts
344 Sex and Discrimination
343 Ivy Blindness
342 Killing GIs
341 Turning Fifteen in Mexico
340 Drunk in Mexico
339 Night of the Dead
338 Peeing on Hydrants
337 Can Israel Last?
336 A Study In Rot
335 Awaiting The Rebellion
334 Cultural Psychiatry
331 Fred, Narcotrafficante
330 Fred's Terror Report
329 Austin: How We Were
328 Radical Feminists
327 Bush, Yet
326 When I Was Tom Sawyer
325 Abolishing Universities
324 The Boy Crisis
323 Travel Ain't What It Was
322 The Nights With Lanc
321 Marsupials at Harvard
320 A Changing America
319 Thoughts On Mexico
318 Thoughts on War
317 Multiculturalism
316 Eighth Grade in Mexico
315 Playing At Manhood
314 Mexican Immigration Law
313 The Hills of Mexico
312 In Darkest Africa
311 Thoughts On Hornets
310 Stolen Viagra, Yet
309 Fred's House
308 Bush Babies
307 In Search Of Darkness
306 The War Against Religion
305 Eternity And Pickletops
304 A Colony Again
303 Intelligent Design
302 New Year In Guad
301 Israel And The Press
300 In Favor Of Extermination
299 Who Wants Diversity?
298 Soldiers and the Press
297 Will Someone Marry Maureen?
296 Death of the Media
295 Paris Burns
294 Brass Pole In Bsngkok
293 PMS
292 Yet More Evolution
291 The Excuse of Poverty
290 Wanna Enlist?
289 Eye-Balling China
288 Looting In New Orleans
287 Thoughts on Slavery
286 Terror in D.C.
285 How To Bail To Mexico
284 Community Policing
283 A Dangerous Woman
282 Things In Heaven And Earth
281 Hant Ponders Furrin Policy
280 Dumb-Ass Stamps In Mexico
279 Chain Saws
278 What Price Iraq?
277 The Chinese Tide
276 Dissolving The Social Contract
275 The Praise Of Rednecks
274 Pitying The Poor
273 Tossing Democracy
272 How We Were
271 Marriage in Mexico, Etc.
270 The Path Of Democracy
269 Reflections On A Funeral
268 Twisted And Twisteder
267 Fredwin On Evolution
266 Hunter Thompson
265 Wussyism At Harvard
264 Marrying Mommy
263 Life In Guadalajara, Sort OF
262 Objective News
261 An Early Literate American
260 Libs And Cons
259 Down With Schools
258 The Death Of Newspapers
257 War's Other Price
256 A Visit To Washington
255 Fred On The Election
254 Fred Endorses Hillary
253 Psychotherapy
252 Death Of The Schools
251 Fredwitz On War
250 The Nature Of Mexican Immigration
249 Solutions From Fred
248 The Jews
247 The Telescreen
246 Cluesless In Bagdad
245 In Praise Of Mexicanas
244 Fred: Mostly Useless
243 On Escaping Democracy
242 Cave Diving
241 Why Fred Be Slow
240 Crimes of Israel
239 Ilsa Koch Gets Kotched
238 The Underclass
237 The Media As Grey Sludge
236 Democracy Explodes Over Iraq
235 The Feminization Of America
234 Nowhere To Hide
233 Governmental Uselessness
232 Lockstep Thinking On Evolution
231 Gay Marriage
230 Uppity White Male
229 Anybody Seen America?
228 Grotesque Self-Promotion
227 Faking Democracy
226 Criminality At NASA
225 The Decline Of English
224 Peddling Ourselves To Death
223 Green Kid Loose In America
222 Crime South Of The Rio Bravo
221 Maybe We Ain’t Bin Ladened
220 Loose in Bangkok
219 Scamming Blacks
218 Uncle Hant And The Law
217 Universities And Athletes Foot
216 Fooling Around In Laos
215 Fred For President
214 Istanbul
213 The Mess in Potamia
212 Sunsets And Mosquito Hawks
211 Apple Pie And Psilocybin
210 More On Mexico
209 Questions Of Faith
208 Deserved Contempt
207 Instinct And Society
206 Our Lousy Airlines
205 Asians And American Research
204 Why Not To Get Married
203 The Surveillance State
202 The National SitCom
201 Hitching Ron And Sara
200 "Whiteness Studies"
199 Dwarf Tossing
198 The Uses Of Patriotism
197 Expatriating: A View
196 Golf And Feminism
195 Achieving Bovocracy
194 Grocery Rack Literature
193 France And War
192 Schooling And The Two Cultures
191 Dark Night In Mexico
190 Copyright And Police Powers
189 Grand Canyon
188 War On Autopilot
187 1953
186 Diving In St. Maarten
185 Playing Harvard's Organ
184 Essaying Empire
183 The Appeal Of War
182 Building Semi-Literates
181 The United States As International Mother-In-Law
180 What's A White Guy To Do?
179 Watering Jane Fonda
178 A Country Eating Itself
177 The Automaticity Of Resegregation
176 The Nature Of Net Journalism
175 The Supreme Court
173 Cathouse Journalism
172 The Suicide Of Marlboro Man
171 Partying In Mexico
170 Left And Right Together
169 Birthing The Ogpu
168 Dropping The Golden Gate
167 Horror And The Air Force
166 Night Train Back Then
165 A Sniper And National Character
164 Thoughts On A Soon Expatriation
163 Thoughts On Environmentalism
162 Smallpox For Everyone
161 Night Shift On Route 301
160 A Well-Regulated State
159 Bin Laden Day
158 Expatting We Will Go
157 Flogging The Kaboom
156 Steve Hatfill And Anthrax
155 How Stable Is America?
154 The Ascension Of Wunxputl
153 Military Reflections
152 Madison Avenue And Killer Slugs
151 Marx In Disguise
150 To Marry Or Not
149 Racial Condescension
148 A Subliminal War
147 Going Faster And Faster
146 Doing The DC Bob
145 Hillary Comes To Florida
144 The Legal System, If Any
143 Exploding At The Airport
142 Immigration And Ebola
141 Hant Explains Space Aliens
140 Women And Accountability
139 Race, Evolution, And Behavior
138 Cannibalism In The Ivy League
137 Outlawing Childhood
136 Nuking New York
135 Women In Combat
134 Queer Studies At Hahvud
133 Airline Security: We Aren't Serious
132 Posing In The Pluke Bucket
131 Whither The Military?
130 Violence And Plastic Soldiers
129 Approximating Democracy
128 Race And Basketball
127 The Attitudes Of Blacks
126 Abolishing Christmas
125 Pondering Web Journalism
124 Managing Us
123 The Plague Of Self-Esteem
122 A Conspiracy For Fred
121 Safened To Death
120 Sex Finally Explained
119 Reading About Afghanistan
118 More On The Death Of The Schools
117 Why White Men Prefer Asian Women
116 American Schools Go Crazy
115 In Favor Of Discourtesy
114 Hant On Policy. If Any.
113 Terrorism: Where Are We Going?
112 The Tide From The South
114 The Trade Center
113 Training Neutered Poodles
112 The Great California Custom-Mower Craze
111 Imposing Common Decency
110 Hant Explains Democracy
109 Reparations For Slavery, Yesss!
108 Storm Sewers And Bottle Rockets
107 China. Bring Your Umbrella.
106 Fred, Fount Of Bulimia
105 Adventuring With Octopus Woman
104 Heresy Regarding Integration
103 Conversations With Hant
102 Assault On The Churches
101 Fred, With Salsa
100 The Annual Paranoia Column
99 Draining The Federal Udder
98 Pondering The Underclass
97 Tag. The Horror. Oh, The Horror.
96 Looting In Cincinnati
95 Napster
94 A Codpiece For Hillary
93 Grade School Attacked By Laser
92 Diaper Rash In Academia
91 Getting Shod In Berkeley
90 Horror In The Suburbs
89 Black And Brown In America
88 Nekkid In Austin
87 The Further Decline Of The Military
86 Surveillance In Digital Times
85 Dueling With The Swamp Rat
84 Diapering Europe
83 Martin Luther King
82 The Canoe As Camel
81 Terror On The Playground
80 Getting Rid Of McKinley
79 The Man Beneath The Bed
78 Dodgeball And Violence
77 How Star Trek Turns Your Brains To Grits
76 Slavery, And Why It's My Fault
75 The Few, The Proud, The Slightly Loony
74 Pondering The National Farce
73 Rats, Dumps, And America
72 The Academic Encouragement Of Squalor For Other people
71 Mowgli And The Digital World Economy
70 Bossy And Aerodynamics
69 Sour Reflections On The New America
68 War, Reality, And Ditz-Bunnies
67 Pottifying The Navy
66 Movies For Giraffes
65 Why You Should Stay Out Of The Military
64 Keeping Sanchez In His Place
63 Why Jonny Cant Rede
62 The Decline Of Manners, And A Cure
61 Interracial Dating
60 Vaporizing Nearly Everywhere
59 The Schools Vs. Boys
58 The Brave New Web
57 Too Many Therapists
56 The Road To Racial Catastrophe
55 A President Crafted by Microsoft
54 Ruining Kids Downtown
53 Divorce: A Lawyer's View
52 Beer And Possums In The Autumn
51 The Barbarians Within The Gates
50 Darwin Elucidated
49 Letter From A Dead Racist
48 Gelded Men And Sexless Women
47 Miracles, If Any
46 The Press, Lemmings, And White Wine
45 David Duke As Black Leader
44 Harassing General Claudia
43 Blacks And The Confederate Flag
42 Multiculturalism: The Continuing Tantrum
41 In Search Of The Wino Vote
40 Lying About Women In The Military
39 Reparations For Blacks: Why?
38 The Loss Of Freedom In An Age Of Comfort
37 Divorce: A Male Perspective
36 Feminists As Mutant Frumps
35 The Universities As Sandbox
34 Blacks And Opportunity
33 Godzilla, Mothra, And Other American Art
32 Men, Women, and Mathematics
31 The Time I Wasn't In Playboy
30 Gun Control: Gimme A Break
29 Marry Virtually Anything
28 Should Voting Be A Felony?
27 Illegitimacy As An Urban Hobby
26 Americana: On The Road In 1969
25 The Gummint's Watching, Sort Of
24 Geeks, Dweebs, and Grief Therapy
23 The World Wide Web As Journalistic Apocalypse
22 Pistons, Teen-agers, and Ultimate Meaning
21 Swedenborg Comes To Matamoscas
20 Are White Males Gods?
19 The Hispanification of America
18 Bat Cagle Comes To Washington
17 The Virtues of Bars
16 Women In The Military II: Letters
15 Racial Profiling, If Any, And The Cops
14 The Marine Corps As Psychotherapy
13 Journalism As A Character Defect
12 Against Marriage (Think About A Collie)
11 Americana: Elvis Seen In UFO
10 Let's Fondle Boy Scouts!
9 Women In the Infantry
8 Why Is John Kennedy Special?
7 The Black Underclass: What now?
6 Gender Wars
5 Elegance in a Biker Bar
4 Affirmative Action
3 A Codpiece For Clinton
2 Blacks and Intelligence
1 Feminist Tarantulas